


The Unlucky Ones

by princejoopie



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: (mostly), Alternate Universe - Mob, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Gun Violence, I'm Bad At Tagging, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, M/M, More tags to be added, dave is a baker and he's soft, if i forgot shit, klaus is in some deep shit, we live by the klave we die by the klave
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:43:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24317518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princejoopie/pseuds/princejoopie
Summary: They were fucked.That was the first thing Klaus thought when a splash of ice cold water dragged him back to consciousness.Completely and royally fucked.OR One murder mystery, Two Lovers, and Three people after them.
Relationships: Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Dave/Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Eudora Patch, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 63
Kudos: 126





	1. Out of Place And Underdressed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He looked like death, but she really hoped he wasn't dead too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I started working on this fic in uhhhhh March of 2019 and proceeded to abandon it for a year but it's _back_ babey B)

"Sir?"

The man was slumped against the wall in the corner of the room, one knee up, splayed out awkwardly, head drooping forward. He wore nothing but a fluffy black tutu and thigh-high striped socks, and a pair of red sequined briefs that Eudora kept her eyes away from. There was a pack of cigarettes tucked into his waistband, and his eyeliner was swept into big gray smudges across his cheeks.

He looked like death, but she really hoped he wasn't dead too.

Squatting down, she reached out and touched his shoulder ever so slightly. Instantly, his head shot up and he jumped as if her hand were a hot iron. "I'm sorry, sir," Eudora said to his deer-in-the-headlights face. "But this house is now an active crime scene and I'm going to have to escort you outside."

The man regained his composure quickly, and a smirk slipped onto his face as he asked, "Can I get my coat first, or is that  _ evidence _ now?"

"Where is it?"

"I remember taking it off in the upstairs bathroom," he said. Then, with a chuckle, added, "One of the last things I remember, honestly."

He watched her pretty, light brown face as she thought. A badge hung around her neck, which made his heart thump a bit harder in his chest. Klaus was never a fan of cops. He almost wanted to just abandon the coat, in case she planned on searching it. But on second thought, it was more than likely that the baggie of coke stashed in the pocket had been stolen by now anyway.

She nodded and said, "I'll bring you outside, and then come back in and grab it." No 'okay?' or 'that sound good to you?' Her matter-of-fact tone made Klaus that much more nervous.

But not nearly as nervous as the man behind her made him. They locked eyes, and Klaus fought his hardest to maintain the stare. It was preferable to gawking at the gaping bullet hole through the guy's forehead.

Eudora turned and looked over her shoulder, unsure what had captured his attention so strongly. There were two officers talking across the room, but nothing that would've warranted the man's wide-eyed stare.

He just swallowed hard and absently mumbled, "Yeah, sounds good."

The cop looked back at him and extended her hand, and Klaus grabbed it, allowing her to help pull him to his feet. After last night, he needed all the help standing he could get.

As much as he tried to focus on anything- literally  _ anything _ \- else, his eyes kept drifting back to the bloody figure standing behind the stained gray couch, as a bit of brain matter seeped out and dribbled down its face.

Klaus felt sick.

He and the woman stepped out of the front door and down the two small steps, which Klaus almost sprained his ankle on,  _ somehow _ . (God, what the fuck did he even  _ do _ last night?)

Once they were outside, she said, "I'll be right back," and walked into the house again, heading for the stairs. Klaus turned his back on the bloody figure and pulled his last cigarette from the pack in his waistband, but it only took him a moment to realize that he didn't have his goddamn lighter. It must've still been in his coat pocket, he thought.

He crossed his arms over his chest, shivering in the biting November wind until he heard a voice behind him.

"So, while I have you," the lady-cop began as she stepped back outside and handed him his coat, "Can you answer a few questions for me?"

As he threw it on, another voice came from behind, back in the house. This one was a deep male voice, asking, "You can see me?" Klaus looked over his shoulder to see the bloody man again.

"Yeah... " he mumbled, "Yeah, I can."

"Okay, good," she said. Eudora once again followed the man's gaze, but she didn't see anything notable for him to be looking at. She didn't stay distracted, though. She dove right in, asking, "So, can you just quickly tell me everything you remember?"

Klaus turned back to look at her, reaching into his pocket for his lighter, but coming up with nothing.  _ Goddamnit. Must've gotten nabbed along with the coke and pills that were supposed to be here too. _

"Uhh… yeah. It's not gonna be much, though," he said with a dry laugh. "Ummm sooo… I showed up around nine. Got to drinking pretty quickly." He wasn't about to mention anything more than alcohol- not to a cop- but he had a feeling that she could've guessed anyway. "And there was really loud music, which was nice."  _ Fewer undead screams. _ "Aaand…"

More than half of his bits and pieces of memory were things he couldn't tell her. Popping any pills anyone handed him, standing with three other people in a closet-sized bathroom doing lines off the edge of the sink, stuff like that. Just about the only things he could say were, "I remember doing a sorta mini-strip show on the coffee table, which, honestly, I'm surprised didn't break. And I remember making out with someone in the little alcove behind the fridge. But that's pretty much it. Don't remember any gunshots."

The cop's eyes had been wandering, but she snapped to attention and looked at him quizzically upon hearing his last sentence.  _ Shit, _ no one had mentioned a gunshot, had they?

"Okay," Eudora said, "Do you remember seeing anyone suspicious-looking?"

"I mean-" He laughed again. "Who there  _ didn't _ look suspicious?" Despite his smile, she saw him shiver. Poor thing was all skin and bones, and it was barely forty degrees out. "But yeah," he continued. "I don't remember anyone too sketchy, and I don't remember anyone who looked like the guy who got shot, really, either."

She gave him that same look. "So… you  _ know _ who it is that was shot?"

"Shit," Klaus mumbled, hopefully inaudibly. "Uhh, I'd never met him, no." He prayed for her not to question it. He really hoped he dodged a bullet there- better than the other guy had, at least.

"But you know what he looks like?"

_ Shit. _ "Uhh no, I don't." Klaus was ready to leave. He was ready to run if need be. He had to start biting his tongue if he didn't want to get arrested. Again.

Eudora wasn't sure what to make of him anymore, though. "But you know someone was shot?"

"Um…" he mumbled, "Lucky guess?"

She raised an eyebrow, debating internally whether she should pursue this conversation further, or whether this was just a random druggie who was still too high from the night before to know what he was talking about.

"So… can you just repeat back to me everything you know about what happened here last night?"

The man took a step back, and his face contorted into a demented sort of smirk. "Nah," he said, "I see what you're doing. You're not getting me that easily. I'm revoking my right to remain silent now,  _ bitch." _

Eudora sighed. "It's  _ in _ voking. And this isn't even a formal questioning."

"Nope! We're done here!" He started walking backward, nearing the street. "If you'll excuse me, I have places to be."  _ And lighters to steal. _

And with that, he was gone, down the sidewalk and toward the convenience store, without even asking about his pants, leaving Eudora alone with an unanswered question and a ghost she couldn't see.

-

The two men approached the figure that sat behind the huge mahogany desk. The walls of the room were lined with framed newspaper clippings about murders and mysterious disappearances of large amounts of money, and other points of pride for their group.

The desk was organized. A small vintage desk lamp- the kind with a green shade, straight out of a noir detective film, which was ironic- as well as a nameplate reading 'E. Pilecki,' two neat stacks of paper, one incoming and the other outgoing, and a Rubik's cube. Solved. The boss was  _ that good. _

The more heavyset of the two men, Loren Smalls, stepped forward. "The job is done."

"Witnesses?" the lone figure asked.

"None, as far as we could tell. No one saw us or where the shot came from."

"Good."

The lankier man, Kitty Columbo, stepped up. "We… we might have a little bit of a problem though."

The woman behind the desk raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And why is that?"

"It's by no fault of ours, ma'am," Kitty said quickly. "But… you know those umbrella freaks? All those washed up kids with superpowers?" The woman nodded. "Well, one of them was there. I recognized him from the tabloids. The one who can see ghosts."

The boss leaned forward in her chair. "So you're saying-"

Loren started, "If Zeph gets to him-"

"-We could be in big trouble," Kitty finished.

No one said anything for a moment. They all knew Zeph Walsh was bad news. Zeph Walsh was  _ really _ bad news.

"What if Zeph gets to him," Loren began quickly, "and tells him everything, and-  _ shit, _ what if he finds the-"

_ "Enough!" _ the boss shouted. "We're not gonna let him or anyone else stand in our way. He stopped bothering us the second you two put a bullet through his skull."

The two men nodded, though Loren was still wide-eyed.

"Here's what's gonna happen. You two are gonna keep an eye on this umbrella kid and make sure he doesn't say a word to anyone. If he tries to, he's out. Got it?"

Loren nodded again, but Kitty spoke up. "But wasn't I supposed to be on the Goldsworth case after this, ma'am?"

"Shit…" the boss mumbled. "Okay, yes. You're on the Goldsworth case. Loren, you and Frenchie are watching our little ghoul friend. Sound like a plan?"

"Yes, ma'am," they both said. The boss's ideas always sounded like a plan, even when they didn't.

"Alright. Thank you for your time, gentlemen. We're checking in first thing in the A.M. Because tonight I have a date."

"Yes, ma'am," the pair said again, before turning and swiftly exiting the room.

-

"No possible weapon?"

Eudora sighed through her nose and curtly replied, "Nothing."

She just couldn't catch a break, could she? First the junkie with his half-answers and abrupt departure, and now this bullshit. This same bullshit as always.

"No casings, even?"

"Diego." She stood up from where she'd been crouching over a blood splatter on the carpet. Crossing her arms, she said, "I know how all of this works. I don't need someone who got thrown out of the police academy to mansplain my own job to me."

He grumbled a bit, scowling as he turned and walked away, but paused before he left the room. "No casings though?"

_ "Out."  _ She pointed to the door.

"Fine," he muttered, dragging his feet over the threshold and down the front steps.

Eudora sighed and followed him. Diego wasn't walking away quickly, but he stopped anyway when he heard her footsteps behind him.

"It's nothing personal, Diego," she said when she caught up to him. "This isn't about…  _ us. _ The fact of the matter is that you're not a cop, and you can't be here."

"Yeah yeah yeah," he replied, swatting his hand at the air. "You don't think I know what I'm doing, I know."

She didn't like raising her voice, but it became more strained the more he pressed. "If you  _ must _ know what I  _ think. _ I think  _ you _ probably don't want to be  _ arrested _ for obstruction of justice.

"I have reasonable suspicion of one of the witnesses, and if we find him again, we're detaining him for questioning.  _ We have this under control, Diego. We do not need you here." _

"Fine, whatever," Diego said, turning to walk away again.

Eudora didn't wait to watch him go, but as she ascended the small front steps to the house, she didn't have to see him to know he turned and looked back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed, hopefully I'll maintain a much more consistent upload schedule with this one than I did with ADITL. (Title from There's a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered by Panic! At the Disco.)


	2. Run From the Devil in Disguise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus stood back up and slowly turned to face the ghost. "Elevator pitch," he said. "You have thirty seconds. Go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Catch me uploading on time out here *finger guns*

Klaus cursed under his breath as he entered the 7-Eleven and saw a man behind the counter. There was a cute cashier who worked there some mornings, and she always let Klaus get away with stealing small things ever since he'd slept with her, but anyone else was a wild card.

Walking down one of the aisles and keeping his head low but his eyes on the man, Klaus heard a voice from behind him. "You know, I wouldn't be surprised if you don't remember this, but you still have ten dollars stashed in your sock. You don't  _ have _ to steal  _ everything." _

Klaus sighed and whispered, "Maybe I want to spend that ten bucks on cigarettes since I only have one left." He glanced up at the cashier again to make sure he didn't notice.

"Or maybe," Ben continued, "You could spend it on  _ food.  _ Or save it for when you really need something."

"Fine," Klaus said a little louder, cringing when the cashier looked over at him. He lowered his voice and continued, "You win. No cigarettes."

Just then, the doorbell chimed, and two men walked in. Everything about them seemed perfectly normal, but something felt off. Despite the wrinkles in their t-shirts and their uncombed hair, the whole thing seemed wooden, as if someone else had chosen their outfits for them.

One was tall and broad- not fat, but far from skinny, and must've been around forty. His dark brown crew cut and stern eyebrows contrasted sharply with the features of the other man, who was all soft edges, save for his pointed nose. This figure was pale and slender, much younger looking than his counterpart, and his hair fell nearly to his shoulders. He seemed like the kind of guy who Klaus might actually top.

The pair of them strolled in, picking an aisle right away and starting to examine the single-serving Pringles cans and little bags of Chex mix. Klaus looked back down at where he was walking, keeping his head low and really wishing he'd asked about his shirt and pants before he left the crime scene.

"Hey," Ben said, for some reason in a whisper, "They keep looking at you."

"Yeah," Klaus replied out of the corner of his mouth, "I'm dressed like a cheap stripper and mumbling to myself. I don't blame them." That didn't stop him from subtly tilting his head up, though, and sure enough, he saw the two of them glancing over at him and talking to each other in a hush. "Probably just a couple of pervs. Human traffickers, maybe."

He looked away from the pair and toward the cashier. Convenience stores always kept the lighters right up near the front, specifically to deter people like Klaus. But people like Klaus had nothing but time on their hands, so it would only take a few failed attempts and scoldings before they perfected the technique.

In a smooth motion, he plucked one from the shelf and slid it into his pocket, and if the cashier saw then he didn't care, because after that, Klaus was on his way out. He probably should've lingered a bit longer to seem less suspicious, but he didn't want to take his chances around the two creeps.

Stepping back outside into the harsh morning light, Klaus immediately grabbed his last cigarette and clicked the new lighter to life. As he pulled the first puff of smoke onto his tongue and into his lungs, he turned back in the direction he'd come from and started walking back down the sidewalk.

"Be careful," Ben said as the pair of them approached the house again, still surrounded by police cars and taped off from the world. The street was still open, though, and an old black car was passing just as Klaus turned to look across the street.

"Yeah, yeah," he responded, "We both know I can outrun the cops if I need to."

"That's not what I'm talking about." Ben pointed. "I'm talking about  _ him." _

Klaus followed Ben's gaze to see the man from before, as grotesque and bloody as ever, staring straight at the two of them. Then the figure stepped down onto the street and started to cross it.

Klaus started to pick up his pace, but the man just walked faster. When Klaus broke into a run, he did too. But what appeared to be a similar model of car- some kind of old black Chevrolet- was turning back onto the street, coming back the way it came, and unlike the ghost, Klaus had to focus on not running in front of it as he crossed the street, which gave the bloody figure enough time to catch up.

"Hey!" it called, closer now but still giving chase. "Please listen to me! I need your help!"

Klaus was starting to wheeze- smoking and running wasn't a good combination- and it wasn't long before he had to stop. Doubled over, clutching his stomach, trying to catch his breath, he choked out, "Yeah, if I had a nickel for every time a ghost has said that to me-"

"Please," the man begged. "It's important. It's not just about me- you could save a  _ lot _ of people."

Klaus stood back up and slowly turned to face the ghost, cringing when he saw the hole in its head up close. "Elevator pitch," he said. "You have thirty seconds. Go."

"I was in the mob," he started quickly, "And I wanted to blow their whole operation open. I was gathering shit to take to the cops- My sister had just had a baby, see, and it made me realize that that wasn't what I wanted to  _ do _ with my life- to hurt people, to- to steal from them, and kill them. I was gathering dirt, but they found out. I was at the party last night to meet with an informant, on the down-low. And the pair of them took the shot through the window, no one saw their faces or anything-"

"Ten seconds." Klaus raised the cigarette back to his lips as he raised an eyebrow at the man.

"And I need you to find it- to take the info to the cops so I didn't die for nothing- I- I didn't-"

"Five."

"I didn't even get to meet-"

"Four."

"-My niece, it-"

"Three."

"It can't  _ end _ like this!"

"Two."

"And you have to help because-"

"One."

"Now they're after you too!"

That caught Klaus's attention. He took another drag of his cigarette and stepped closer. "What do you mean they're-"

He stopped. The old black Chevrolet was driving back up the street in the opposite direction, even slower than before. Peering through the tinted driver's side window, Klaus could just make out the figures of the two men from the 7-Eleven. He jumped back and looked up at the ghost, wide-eyed. "Why are they-"

"They must know you can see me," the ghost said. "And they think-" The car sped off down the street, and the bloody man took off after it. "Come on! We can get the plate number!" he shouted, looking back over his shoulder at Klaus.

For some reason or another, Klaus found himself following- running after the man and the car as fast as he could without his lungs giving out again. His arms felt heavy and his tongue felt dry, but still, he ran.

They were no match for a speeding car, though- even an old one-and Klaus found himself running out of motivation as quickly as he was running out of breath.

"God _ damn _ it!" the ghost yelled once he stopped running too. The car was long gone.

Klaus was wheezing, there were tears in his eyes, and he'd lost his cigarette somewhere along the way. And all for nothing.

"Chevelle," a voice came from behind them. "Chevrolet Chevelle. Plate started with EDP. Couldn't get the rest."

Klaus laughed giddily. "Ben, you're a lifesaver! Come on, let's go back to the house and find the cops."

"Hey kid?" the ghost called. Klaus looked up and saw flashes of blue and red flickering on the man's incorporeal face. "I don't think  _ you _ have to find  _ them." _

Before Klaus had time to even consider running, the car was in view and the sirens blared to life. He couldn't run, though. His legs would surely give out before he could even make it another block. So he just raised his arms where they were visible and stood in silence as two officers emerged from the car and cuffed his wrists behind his back.

"You're being detained on the grounds of reasonable suspicion for the murder of Martin L. Walsh," one of the cops said. "You're being taken in for further questioning."

The pair of officers were still forceful in shoving him into the backseat of the car, even though he was going willingly. Nothing he wasn't used to, at least.

Klaus didn't see Ben climb in behind him, but he was nonetheless in the next seat over when the door was slammed shut. 

Eyeing the two cops as they took their positions in the front of the car, Klaus leaned over and whispered to Ben out of the corner of his mouth, "If bail is more than ten dollars, I'm fucked."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stuff's getting interestinggg. Feedback is appreciated as always <3 (Title from Bullet by Steel Train.)


	3. Visit Me In Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let me see him," Diego demanded. "I need to talk to him."
> 
> "What you need is to leave."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me with that sexy consistent upload schedule.

"Who let you in here?"

Diego sighed with a slight smile. "Don't be so uptight, Eudora," he said, sitting on the edge of her desk. "I'm just here for an update."

She placed a hand firmly in the center of his back and shoved him off the desk, glaring up at him from her sitting position when he turned to face her.

"If you  _ must _ know, it was Stevenson."

"Great." Eudora sighed. "I'll get on his ass about that when I'm not so busy. Because I'm  _ very busy _ right now, you know."

She looked back down at her stack of papers and continued ignoring Diego's repeated pleas and "oh come  _ on" _ s. It wasn't until he reached down and snatched one of the papers out from under her that Eudora snapped.

_ "Hey!"  _ she shouted. But by the time she grabbed it back, it was already too late. The damage had been done.

Diego stared down at her, wide-eyed, and whispered, "Are you kidding me?"

Eudora sighed heavily and said, "Maybe this is why I didn't want you interfering!"

"Are you  _ kidding _ me?!" he repeated, this time in a shout that caused others throughout the station to turn their heads in the pair's direction. Eudora rested an elbow on her desk, lowering her head into her hand and cringing. "Are you kidding- You just- Why- You can't-" Diego kept starting more sentences but was unable to finish any of them.

"I can," Eudora interjected. "I can and I did. Laws are laws, Diego, and we have to arrest suspects even if they're-"

_ "Even if they're my baby brother?!" _

_ "Yes, Diego!"  _ she snapped. If there were any eyes in the room that hadn't been on them before, they certainly were now. She lowered her voice. "Yes, Diego. Even if it's your baby brother. As soon as I saw the name-" She sighed in exasperation again. "This is  _ exactly _ why I didn't want you in here."

Diego  _ wasn't _ on the verge of tears at the thought of his 'little' sibling going to prison for years upon years for a crime he didn't commit.  _ Definitely _ not. "You guys kn- _ know  _ him. Y-you  _ know _ he could n-never do something like this."

"I don't personally know him, no," she said. "And even if I did, it's not my job to  _ know _ things, Diego. It's my job to collect evidence and draw my conclusions from there."

"Well what kind of  _ 'evidence' _ could you p-possibly have found when he's innocent!?" Diego was silently cursing himself every time that goddamn stutter acted up.

"You don't  _ know _ he's innocent, Diego," Eudora said flatly, wishing for once in her life that she was doing paperwork. "You know, Ted Bundy's family and friends said he could never do something like that either."

"Klaus isn't Ted fucking Bundy!" Diego exclaimed, probably too loudly. He lowered his voice. "Frankly, he's not smart enough for that. And he doesn't hold grudges either. He can be a selfish prick sometimes but he'd n- _ never _ have any reason to  _ kill _ anyone."

_ "He knew too much, Diego," _ Eudora said firmly. "He knew more than he should've.  _ A lot _ more than he should've. Enough to take him in."

Diego opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Not because of the stutter, but because the words had just run dry, so he closed it again.

Eudora's face softened. "Listen, I've seen this a lot. I know how hard it is to come to terms with something like this. And I'm not even saying it's  _ true _ necessarily. But you have to accept that it's a possibility, Diego."

He just stared down at the desk, practically unblinking.  _ His little sibling. Klaus. Killing someone. _

His head shot back up. "No," he said firmly. "No, this is bullshit, all of it. Klaus could  _ never." _

Eudora just rolled her eyes and sighed again. "Diego-"

"Let me see him," Diego demanded. "I need to talk to him."

"What you  _ need _ is to leave," Eudora retorted.

Diego only had time to shout, "Not until I see him!" and slam a fist down on the desk before he was being led away by two officers- two former friends of his. And by the time they told the receptionist not to let him back in no matter who says it's okay, Diego was already kicking at the cold metal of a chair leg and letting out little growl-like sounds of frustration.

Klaus was in there, probably alone and scared. Diego shuddered at the thought. Who knows what kind of creepy men were back there with him? And who knows what kind of ghosts?

-

"Hey," the voice came from across the room, snapping Klaus back down from his thoughts and into the real world.

He wouldn't have been able to guess the time if his life depended on it. After the first hour, everything blends together. and the light streaming in through the small barred windows was his only indication that no more than a day had passed since he got here.

Some light, some interrogating, some dark, some sleep, some more light, some silence. Lots and lots of silence today. They said they'd take him back for more questioning, but they hadn't yet. And it was starting to get to him.

Sitting alone in a cell felt all too familiar. Sure, Klaus had been in the station jail plenty of times, but there had always been people around. Usually middle-aged, perverted fucks, but it was company nonetheless. He wished those men were here now, especially because the cops had since retrieved his actual shirt and pants from the crime scene.

But no. He was alone. And it brought his mind back even further, to much,  _ much _ worse things.

It was just a matter of time before the ghosts started showing up. He could feel himself start to sweat- even with his coat slid halfway off- his breathing growing short and forced, his eyes closing tightly, his tongue dry.

And second-  _ any damn second _ \- a ghost would walk through that door, Klaus  _ knew _ it.

And that was when the call of, "Hey," sounded through the room. Klaus's head snapped up and he saw his brother in the doorway. He sighed and slumped back down into the corner.

So, he  _ was _ right, technically.

"I got you a present," Ben said, walking over to the cell with a skip in his step.

Klaus just rolled his head to the side and eyed his brother. "What is it?" he mumbled. "This better be good." Despite his shortness with Ben, Klaus still found his shoulders releasing tension, and his breathing starting to slow.

Ben lifted his hand, and the keys on the ring it held jangled slightly. "This good enough for you?"

Klaus scrambled to his feet, eyes wide.  _ "Shit, _ Ben, how did you-"

"Not easily. Now take them, I don't know how much longer I can hold it."

Nodding vigorously, Klaus leapt forward and grabbed the keys through the bars.

Fumbling around to reach the lock on the other side, he tried one, and then two, neither of which would fit, and then a third, which fit but didn't turn, until finally the fourth caused the mechanisms to click and give way, allowing him to slide a section of the bars to the side and step out into the walkway.

He looked toward the door Ben had come in from. Surely there was no way he could leave through there, right?

As if his power was telepathy instead of a Lovecraftian beast, Ben said, "There's a fire door nearby, if you think you can run fast enough. Follow me."

The pair stepped out of the room into a narrow hallway, which was guarded at one end by a cop, but the other side, leading to an emergency exit, was clear.

Klaus tiptoed slowly toward the door, trying- and failing- to keep his breathing steady and level. Once there, he looked at the sign on the door, and then to Ben.

_ EMERGENCY EXIT. ALARM WILL SOUND. _

Ben shrugged. Wide-eyed, Klaus swallowed hard and reached forward so his hand was resting just lightly on the push bar. He looked at Ben.

"Fuck it, right?" he whispered, and with a firm shove he was outside in the harsh afternoon light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all enjoyed, as always. (Title from Homecoming by Green Day.)


	4. I Can't Explain A Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So... That was... something," he mumbled.
> 
> Klaus sighed through his nose and replied, "Certainly was."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of the moments you've all been waiting for.. 'tis finally upon us.

Klaus could see the red and blue flashes reflecting off of every windshield and metal pole he ran past. Weaving between people and around strollers and under construction scaffolding, he still knew that he was no match for the cars. A few were approaching from behind, and one was pulling up across the intersection ahead of him.

Quickly turning, Klaus sprinted down an alley, scaling a chain-link fence and landing hard on the other side. Thankfully, he was no stranger to running.

But as he turned onto the street at the other end, he saw another cop car on either side, and a lone officer had gotten out of a car behind him and was climbing the fence as Klaus stood floundering, wasting precious seconds.

He picked a direction and took off down the street. There had to be  _ somewhere. _

The cop would be on him any moment, so in a split second, he threw the nearest door open and dove inside.

If the smell of pastries and fresh bread was any indication, he'd ended up in a bakery.

"Good afternoon," the man behind the counter said with a grin. He had curly dirty-blonde hair and bright blue eyes that matched his checkered apron. Klaus almost had time to feel bad for the man with what he was about to do next, but by the time the guy said, "How can I help you toda-" Klaus was already leaping over the counter, curling in on himself and pressing his back firmly up behind it.

The man looked at him through wide eyes, hearing the sirens and seeing the flashing lights. "What did you do?" he mouthed.

"Nothing!" Klaus said in a frantic whisper. "They think I killed someone but I didn't!"

The doorbell jingled again and Klaus froze.

"Hello, officer," the baker said calmly. "Can I help you with anything?"

"Yeah," a gruff voice said from over the counter. "We're looking for a runaway. Wanted for murder, potentially very dangerous. Guy's six-foot, brown hair, green eyes, big stupid coat. Seen him around?"

Klaus squeezed his eyes shut tightly. But the man said, "Yeah, I think I just saw someone like that run by outside, actually," and Klaus let out the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

"Okay, thanks," came the reply. But Klaus didn't hear footsteps walking away. The cop just stood, clearly focused on something. Klaus looked up and made a split-second of nervous eye contact with the baker, as he could practically feel the cop's gaze penetrating the back of his skull through the display case.

"And uhh… While I'm at it, can I get one of those raspberry scones?"

Klaus struggled to keep his sigh of relief silent. The baker nodded, sliding open the back of the case- the panel where Klaus wasn't- and picking up the pastry with a piece of wax paper before placing it into a small brown bag.

"Thanks," the cop said. Klaus assumed there was money exchanged, but he was too busy focusing on the thumping in his ears to care.

He didn't move when he heard the sound of footsteps retreating, nor when he heard the bell chime and the door close again. It wasn't until the baker said, "Hey," that he turned his head to look up.

"Hey," he said back.

The man swallowed hard, wide-eyed, looking nervous. "I, um... I'm Dave."

"Klaus."

"So... That was... something," Dave mumbled.

Klaus sighed through his nose and replied, "Certainly was."

"What... What- you- you don't have to tell me this if you don't want to, but... what  _ happened?" _

Klaus stood on unsteady legs. "It's... a  _ long _ story, but, basically, I was at a party where a guy was killed, and they seemed to think the most evidence pointed to me, for some reason, even though I was high off my ass and wouldn't have been able to even walk in a straight line, let alone fire a gun." He chuckled, but Dave still looked concerned.

"Damn, I'm sorry. That's awful. How do you think you're gonna get out of it?"

"Not sure," Klaus said. "But breaking out of jail probably wasn't the way to get myself off the hook, huh?"

Dave pursed his lips. "No, probably not."

"It's fine though," Klaus continued with a wave of his hand as he hopped up to sit on the counter and slide himself back over it. "I've been dealing with cops since I was seventeen, I can manage."

He was halfway to the door when Dave asked from behind him, "Are you sure? Because I can try to help, if you need anything."

Klaus turned back, studying the man's face for any sign of malicious intent, but not finding any. "I appreciate it," he said finally, "But for your sake, I really think you shouldn't get involved."

"Okay," Dave replied, a bit dejectedly. "Well, you know where to find me if there's anything I can do to help."

Klaus nodded and turned back toward the door.

"And Klaus? Please be careful, okay?"

Nodding again, Klaus leaned forward and peeked out through the windows in either direction to make sure he'd lost the cops, before opening the door with another jingle of the bell and stepping out onto the cold sidewalk again.

-

An alarm sounding and at least half of the cops rushing out of the building was exactly the distraction Diego needed to slip through the door back into the station.

This time, instead of making his way to the offices to continue pestering Eudora, he headed straight back to the holding cells. He was surprised to see, however, that the officer who normally stood guard over the cells was missing.

Cautiously stepping into the dimly-lit hallway, he turned and entered the room containing all of the cells, and was even more surprised by what he found there.

Nothing.

Not a soul. No guard. No creepy men. And more importantly, no Klaus. Just empty, musty cells, all with doors standing open.

He was about to take another step forward, but before he could react, a sharp tug on his ear dragged him back into the hallway.

_ "What the hell did you do?!" _ Eudora demanded.

"Nothing! Not a thing! I was in the lobby the  _ whole _ time, you can ask Janet."

Taking hold of his arm and pulling him along with her, Eudora continued, "This doesn't look great for you, you know. At the very least, do you have any idea where he might've gone?"

_ "No _ clue. He's a goddamn drifter, he could be  _ anywhere," _ Diego replied. He tugged himself out of her grip and continued walking beside her.

She sighed. "Okay." Stopping in front of the door to the lobby, she said, "Now, you,  _ out. _ For real this time. Even if you didn't break him out, it won't do us any favors to have everyone thinking you did."

Diego rolled his eyes and pushed open the door. "Keep me updated though, okay?"

"No." And with that she was back in the office and out of his view.

-

Klaus threw a glance over his shoulder as he entered the alley. He had more reason than usual to be wary of cops. But the coast seemed clear, so he turned back to the man waiting for him a few yards ahead.

He was short, in a dark hoodie that obscured his forehead and eyes, and the rest of him was cast in shadow by the large buildings on either side of him that blocked out the afternoon sun.

Klaus's face broke out into a grin as he approached, and in one fluid motion of their hands, the man was holding a wad of cash and Klaus was holding a small baggie of blue pills. The familiar choreography of the act and the promise of a satisfying- if temporary- escape from reality was exactly what Klaus needed in all of the madness around him.

By the time the dealer had turned and was making his way toward the other end of the alley, Klaus had already opened the bag and thrown two pills onto his tongue.

Just as he was about to step out onto the sidewalk, though, he stopped in his tracks. Across the street, an old black Chevrolet was parked. He felt his stomach sink and his breathing quicken.

He had no time to react, though, before a punch to the jaw had him stumbling back and landing on his ass on the pavement. Coming into view above him were two men- the same two men that had been trailing him the previous day- and the thin one was holding a length of thick rope, the sight of which sent a shiver down Klaus's spine.

Klaus always had a feeling he'd get kidnapped someday, but he didn't expect it to happen so soon.

In an instant, he was grabbed and lifted from the ground by the larger man. Any amount of thrashing and kicking wouldn't let Klaus escape his grip, and the guy was trying to force his arms into place behind his back.

"Frenchie, you idiot, tie him already!" the man demanded. Klaus saw the other man nod, wide-eyed, and bring the rope forward.

Klaus felt it against his wrists, and he really,  _ really _ regretted not taking Dave up on his offer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed my cruel cliffhanger. >:) Feedback, as always, is appreciated. (Title from (Coffee's For Closers) by Fall Out Boy.)


	5. They Look So Tired, Sound Uninspired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus sighed, turning to walk away, with Dave at his heels. "Well that was fucking useless."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More! Dave! Content! I know y'all have been waiting for it.

Klaus felt the rope against his wrists, and he really,  _ really _ regretted not taking Dave up on his offer.

He tried to think back to his training, though. Not the training by his father, which only ever did more harm than good, but the training from those secret nights of sneaking into the foyer and getting his ass kicked by Diego until Pogo caught them and sent them back to bed.

But sometimes he got his ass kicked a little less, and he tried to channel those strategies now.

An ear bite, then a knee to the groin, and he was wiggling out of the large man's grasp just as he'd do with his brother so many years ago.

_ "Go for his neck with the rope, dumbass!" _ shouted the man, now doubled over, to his partner.

The other just stood frozen, wide eyes locking with Klaus's for half a second before Klaus was sprinting in the opposite direction, nearly tripping over his own feet as he forced every ounce of power he had down into his legs.

After a couple of blocks and the turn of a corner, he pulled open another random door and slid inside, and when he turned away from the windows, confident enough that he'd lost them, he found himself in a record store.

"Hello," said the woman behind the counter, "My name's Michelle, let me know if there's anything I can help you with today."

Klaus just smiled and started flipping through the records in the fifty-percent-off bin in front of him. He registered a few names- Tiffany, The Doors, Queen- but for the most part, his mind was churning with ideas of what his next move should be.

Michelle asked if she could help him, but she couldn't. Not really. Not the way someone else might be able to.

-

Even with the bus ride, Klaus's legs were still on fire by the time he reached the bakery.

"This is a bad idea," Ben said as Klaus pulled the door open and heard the familiar bell. "You don't know this guy  _ at all." _

Klaus just ignored his brother, instead focusing on the way Dave smiled upon seeing him walk in.

"Hey," he said through his grin, "Welcome back." Before Klaus could smile in return, though, Dave's face dropped. "Are you okay though? Do you need help?"

Klaus sheepishly nodded. "Uh... Yeah. I think so."

But that nagging voice in his head- or, standing beside him in a black hoodie, more accurately- chimed in with, "You should talk to Diego instead. You don't know this guy, Klaus. Plus, he's a  _ baker. _ We really should go to Diego for this. He knows more about cops  _ and _ criminals."

Klaus tried to ignore him, though, and continued, "I ran into some pretty bad people. It's, well... the whole thing is a long story. But I need help."

Dave nodded, brows furrowed in concern. "Of course. What do you need?"

_ "Klaus,"  _ Ben persisted.

Klaus sighed and said, "I just... I think I need an escort to my brother's place. I'm worried about running into anyone else on the way there."

"Okay," Dave said. "I don't have a car though."

"That's okay. We can take the bus. I..." Klaus paused, looking down at his sneakers. "I just don't want to be alone." When he looked back up, Dave was nodding.

"Okay." He looked at the clock. "Can it wait a few minutes though? I close at five."

Four forty-three, read the clock. "Of course," Klaus said, hopping up onto the counter to sit next to the register. Dave just smiled and shook his head. "Hey, not my fault there are no seats in here."

"Touché," Dave said.

-

"This is us," Klaus muttered as he pulled open the door to the now-empty boxing gym. "He lives in the back room."

"That sucks," Dave said, stepping in behind him.

Klaus shrugged. "Better off than me."

As they neared the boiler room, Klaus's heart rate started picking up at every slight creak or flickering of a shadow. He found himself hoping it was only the ghosts.

When finally, mercifully, they reached the door, Klaus gingerly knocked and called out, "Hellooo? It's your favorite murderer."

After a moment of silence- save for Dave's chuckle at Klaus's words- the door swung open and Diego stepped out, immediately demanding, "What the  _ hell _ are you doing here?!"

"I need your help, Di, I need you to help me hide fr-"

"You know what? You can deal with the cops on your own, dumbass. If you'd just fucking  _ stayed _ there I could've gotten you out-"

"We both know that isn't true."

"-And then maybe you wouldn't be on the run!"

"It's  _ not _ the cops, though!" Klaus exclaimed. "It's the  _ mob, _ Diego. The murder was some mafia hit and now, because I'm a witness, they're after me and they keep following me around in this- What's it called?" He looked at Ben, who stood at the entrance to the back hall.

Not looking up from his book, he replied, "Nineteen sixty-eight Chevrolet Chevelle."

"Yes, thank you Ben!" Klaus said, cringing at the quizzical look Dave sent him. "Sixty-eight Chevrolet Chevelle. Black. Really creepy."

Diego rolled his eyes and turned to go back inside.

Klaus just followed him, though, whining, "Diegooooo, pleeeeease?"

_ "No," _ came the firm reply. "You got yourself into this. But if  _ I _ were you-" He turned and poked a finger into Klaus's chest. "I'd worry more about the cops than about random black cars you've seen around. What makes you so sure it's the mob anyway?"

"It's…" Klaus turned and looked back over at Dave. How the hell would he explain the ghosts, his backstory, and everything that came with it? He turned back to Diego. "It's complicated," he said simply. "But I have my reasons."

_ "Out," _ Diego said, "Before the cops are on my ass too." Despite his sibling's pout, Diego stayed silent, so Klaus just turned and walked back up to where Dave was standing.

Just before they started to make their way out, though, Diego pointed a finger at Dave. "And  _ you. _ I don't know who you are but you need to stay out of this, out of  _ him,  _ and his business. He's a fucking mess and you should steer clear for your own sake." Then he stepped forward and shut the door in their faces.

Klaus sighed, turning to walk away, with Dave at his heels. "Well that was fucking useless."

"Yeah," was all Dave mumbled in return.

It wasn't until they were outside and walking back in the vague direction of the bus stop that Dave spoke up again. "So what do we do now?"

"Dave," Klaus said before pausing. "...What do you mean by  _ 'we?'" _

"I mean...  _ We.  _ Us. You and me. What else would it mean?"

Klaus just stayed silent as he looked both ways to cross the street. It wasn't until they were on the other side that he replied, "I don't know. You just... You don't have to stick with me on this, you know. You  _ really truly honestly _ don't know what you're getting yourself into."

"Mob shit and police shit," Dave said simply, "I realize that."

"I mean, stuff  _ with me _ too.  _ About  _ me. There's just stuff you... wouldn't understand."

They were nearing the bus stop- just at the opposite end of the park they were passing- and Klaus continued, "Maybe you-"

_ "Pssst- Hey kid!" _

Klaus turned and saw the ghost again- the one who'd gotten him into this whole fucking mess. He stood under a large oak tree around fifty yards from the sidewalk. Klaus made a face back, brow furrowed with a slight head shake, as if to say,  _ What is it this time? _

"It's me, Zeph!" he called, as if Klaus didn't know. "Let me show you where it's buried!" He waved his hand in a 'come here' gesture.

Klaus just shot back a puzzled look. He didn't want to speak for fear of Dave wondering what the hell he was doing, but Dave noticed anyway, and was looking at Klaus with an equally confused face. Maybe it was the whole 'stopping in his tracks and making faces at nothing' thing, Klaus thought.

"The evidence! Get over here! It's right here next to this tree!"

Klaus just shook his head and started walking again.

"Hey!  _ Kid!"  _ the ghost called again, but Klaus ignored him.

He tried to remember where he'd left off in conversation. "Maybe... Maybe you should just get on the bus without me."

"...Oh," Dave mumbled.

"Just... you shouldn't be helping me with this. You seem like such a sweet guy, and I don't want you getting all wrapped up in everything with me."

Dave stayed silent for a moment as they reached the bus stop, before asking, "Ever consider that maybe I  _ want _ to help?"

Klaus just stared at him and the sincerity on his face. "... _ Why?" _

"I have no idea," Dave said, face breaking out into a grin. "But I do."

Klaus opened his mouth to speak, but the squeal of the bus brakes cut him off as it pulled up in front of the pair.

The door slid open and Dave stepped on, looking back at Klaus for a moment before extending his hand. "Coming?"

Klaus smiled. "Yeah. Of course." He took Dave's hand and let himself be pulled onto the bus behind him.

Once they were settled into two of the last remaining seats, Dave said, "So... You never answered my question. What  _ is _ the plan, exactly?"

Klaus sighed. "Haven't thought that far ahead yet." He looked down at his feet and tried to rack his brain for possibilities. "Well... there is  _ one _ person I can think of to go to, who might be able to have  _ some _ kind of influence here, but... I'd almost rather be kidnapped and tortured by the mob," he said with a dry laugh.

"Who is it?" Dave asked.

"...My dad."

They sat in silence for several long seconds, until Dave finally said, "Okay. But maybe we should wait until morning. It's getting pretty dark."

"Yeah, good idea. So, where should you and I meet up?"

Dave looked puzzled. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"Like, you go home and I find someplace to stay and we reconvene in the morning?" Klaus said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh. Yeah, we could do that."

Klaus hesitated. "...Why, what were  _ you _ thinking?"

"I just... I guess I just assumed you'd be staying with me," Dave said, rather sheepishly.

Klaus laughed, but Dave didn't. "...Holy shit, you're serious."

"I mean... yeah, if you want to. You don't have to, of course."

Klaus thought about the alternative- sleeping with some rando for a bed or renting a shitty motel with the last few dollars he had leftover from work earlier.

Feeling his heart start to race again, he reached into his pocket for the bag, sticking out his tongue and throwing back a couple more pills.

With a nod and a shy smile, he turned back to Dave and said, "Yeah. That sounds nice."

-

_ 'Domestic disturbance at 304 West Kennedy,'  _ the voice said as the radio crackled to life.

It was nearly midnight, but still, Diego dropped the mop and ran for his bag on the other side of the ring. It was never too late for justice.

Once his mask was on and his knife harness was strapped into place, he turned and walked swiftly to the exit.

Pushing the door open, Diego froze where he stood. Parked across the street was an old black car. He couldn't tell the model, but he could see the driver- a largish man in his forties with a brown buzzcut- who was  _ definitely _ looking at  _ him. _

They locked eyes, and the man threw the car into gear and sped off into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for next chapter. I know many of y'all will be interested ;) As always, feedback is appreciated <3 (Title from Nobody Likes The Opening Band by IDKHow)


	6. Keep Me Up, Keep Me In Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We should probably get some sleep," Dave said quietly. "We have a long day of running from the cops tomorrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure a number of you have been eagerly awaiting this. You were promised it in the tags, after all. ;) (Also I hope no one notices this is going up a few minutes late oops.)

"I need to talk to you."

"Funny, because I don't need to talk to you."

"Seriously, Eudora!" Diego exclaimed, "This is important!"

"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?"

Diego let out something of a growl and slammed his hands down onto her desk. "I'm serious, I might have a huge break in the case!"

Eudora leaned back in her chair and examined his face. If nothing else, he clearly believed what he was saying, even if she didn't. "Fine. I'll bite. Tell me  _ all _ about it," she said sarcastically.

"Okay," Diego began, "I talked to Klaus yesterday and he said-"

"You  _ what?" _

Diego paused. "...What?"

Eudora leaned forward again, staring daggers into him. "Why am I just hearing about this now?"

"...Because now is when I came to tell you?" Diego guessed.

Throwing up her arms in outrage, Eudora asked, "You talked to him and didn't think to call me right away?!"

"Last time I tried calling you, you said, 'lose my number and never call me here again,'" Diego deadpanned.

"I'm  _ serious!" _

Diego sighed and said, "Can you at least humor me for two minutes? After that you can yell at me all you want."

Eudora opened her mouth to speak but Diego cut her off and again said, "Two minutes."

She sat back in her chair, arms crossed, and replied, "Two minutes."

With nothing else to lose, he dove right in and said, "Okay. Klaus is being followed by the mob."

Eudora raised an eyebrow. "...What?"

"Klaus is being-"

"No, I heard you, just... Wha- Hmph." She hesitated. "What mob?"

"I don't know," Diego said, voice growing more frantic. "But he's being followed around by these two guys in this creepy old black car and-"

"And what makes you so sure that this is mob stuff?" Eudora asked. "Couldn't these just be random stalkers?"

"I... Klaus... he..." Diego trailed off. Looking down, he mumbled. "He said he had, um... reasons."

Eudora just stared blankly at him. "Aaand... did he tell you what those  _ reasons _ are, by any chance?"

Diego pursed his lips and stayed silent.

"It's been two minutes. Now it's my turn."

Despite looking back up in her direction, Diego's eyes were unfocused, just staring into space. "What."

"Do you know where he is? Where he was planning on going or what he might be doing?"

Diego shook his head. "Not a clue."

Huffing out a sigh, Eudora facetiously said,  _ "Great _ detective work, Diego." She stood up and nodded toward the door. "Now I think it's time for you to leave, before you do any more damage."

Defeated, Diego turned and walked out, not looking back at her.

As soon as he was settled in his car, his scanner radio blinked and crackled and a dispatcher started speaking. Eyes widening, Diego mumbled, "No way," and quickly started the car, speeding off in the direction of his childhood home.

-

Despite having eaten breakfast in comfortable silence, Klaus and Dave talked about anything and everything on the bus and the remaining walk to the mansion.

Anything and everything except Klaus's background, of course. He was contemplating asking Dave to leave him at the corner just to save himself the trouble of explaining it all.

A block before he had to make the decision, though, a black car screeched to a halt across the street from them.  _ "Fuck," _ Klaus whispered, accidentally making eye contact with the driver. "That's them."

Dave looked over at the car, brow furrowed. After a moment's pause, he said, "I'm gonna go talk to them."

"Dave  _ no!" _ Klaus shouted, but by the time he reached out to try to grab Dave's sleeve, he was already off the curb and making his way toward the open driver's side window.

Seeing the approaching man, Loren turned and muttered, "Who does this asshole think he is," as he reached to open the center console. As soon as he wrapped his hand around the grip of his pistol, though, Frenchie's hand was around his wrist. "What the hell do you think you're doing, kid?" he demanded through gritted teeth.

Frenchie just shook his head and mumbled, "Don't."

"I don't give a shit if he's not the one we're after. If he's in our way, he's in our way. Now  _ let go _ before I-"

He froze. So did Frenchie. And so did the man approaching his car and the figure running into the street after him.

Sirens.

By the time Dave was nearly at the window of the car, it was speeding out onto the street and Klaus's hand was in his.

"Let's go!" Klaus shouted, pulling him back to their side of the street and down onto the next block.

Dave nearly sped past him when he stopped short at a large metal gate, trying to pull it open but finding it locked. Dave barely had time to look up and register the ornate front of what must be a very fancy building before Klaus had grabbed his hand and was pulling him along again. Klaus mumbled something sounding like, "We'll try around back," as he ran.

Whipping around the corner and down the side street, Klaus stopped again and ran down a few concrete steps into a small alcove that appeared to be the front of a coffee shop or diner of some sort, but it was hard for Dave to see inside due to the windows being plastered with various papers and posters.

Examining it more carefully, Dave could just make out a large industrial-looking kitchen inside, but he barely had time to wonder what it was or why it was there before Klaus was shouting, "Shit! Locked," and grabbing his hand to continue dragging him forward.

From there it was a blur of twists and turns and back alleys. Klaus would yell,  _ "Here!  _ We can go through here!" and sprint into a hair salon, weaving through all of the back passages into a dry cleaner's and out into an alleyway. Or he'd run for one street only for his eyes to widen and him to turn on his heels and yell, "Go back!" despite Dave never seeing a police car ahead of them.

It felt like they ran through the whole city. Dave's legs were about to give out and his lungs ached. Finally, Klaus grabbed his hand again, which made his heart rate pick up even more, and pulled him behind a crappy motel and behind a large green dumpster.

They both immediately slumped against the wall, trying to catch their breath as they listened to the sirens all around them. Dave saw Klaus look up at nothing and mouth a word or two, but he was too exhausted to wonder why.

"Thanks," Klaus had whispered in Ben and Zeph's direction, all three of them grinning as the two ghosts high-fived.

It was only then that he realized his fingers were still intertwined with Dave's. Klaus quickly pulled his hand away, and he could've sworn Dave's face flickered into a slight frown, but he didn't think much of it.

They waited for what felt like hours until the sirens finally died down. Standing and stretching, they looked at each other, and Dave mumbled, "So, um... Want to get a room? We'd probably have trouble making it back to my place."

Klaus nodded. "Yeah, if you don't mind paying. I don't have much cash."

"Of course," Dave said. "No problem."

After a moment's hesitation, they both turned and started making their way toward the front office.

As they walked, though, they spotted a lone officer in a patrol car slowly cruising down the street. "Head down," Klaus muttered, looking at the ground as they approached the front door.

They made it inside without a hitch, but Klaus still found himself pacing and impatiently tapping his foot the whole time Dave was booking the room.

By the time the pair stepped outside, sirens were sounding in the distance again, and they quickened their pace as they headed for the staircase that would take them up to their room.

-

Climbing out of the car, Eudora wasted no time in walking to the office and placing the warrant paper on the desk in front of the large woman attending it. Two sightings of the same escaped criminal on the same day and she was drained of every bit of patience she had left.

"We received a report of a fugitive checking into this motel a few minutes ago," she said, "And we need access to his room."

Sighing, the woman behind the counter typed the name into her computer before looking up at Eudora and saying, "I'm sorry, but no one by that name is booked into a room here."

Eudora raised an eyebrow and opened her mouth to speak when an officer chimed in from behind her, saying, "It must be that other guy he was with."

"Do you have a warrant out for him?" the clerk asked.

Eudora sighed. "No, but-"

"Then I'm sorry, honey, but there's nothing I can do for you."

Letting out something of a frustrated growl, Eudora snatched the paper off of the counter and stormed out of the office.

-

Klaus watched the cars retreat through the gap in the curtains, and turned back to Dave, who was sitting on the bed, and said, "That was close."

Dave nodded, saying, "Today has been one 'close' after another, I think."

"Yeah," Klaus mumbled, turning to face him and smiling shyly. "And, um... Thank you. For... everything. I'd be so fucked without you, seriously."

Dave returned the smile and replied, "Yeah, of course. It's no problem." They locked eyes for a brief moment before both looking away and letting out awkward laughs. "We should, um... We should probably get some sleep," Dave said quietly. "We have a long day of running from the cops tomorrow."

"Yeah," Klaus agreed with a chuckle. "Good idea." He turned to face the window, dropping his coat and pulling his shirt over his head.

He opened his mouth to speak as he turned back toward Dave, but all words and thoughts left his head when he saw that Dave now had his shirt off too. He was all muscle- huge pecs and biceps, with rock-hard abs- and Klaus had to focus all of his energy on closing his mouth so he wouldn't start to drool.

Dave couldn't help the blush that crept onto his cheeks as Klaus stared. He couldn't keep his eyes off either, though, as he took in all of Klaus's smooth edges and lightly tanned skin.

Stepping forward slowly, he placed one hand on Klaus's hip, the other coming up to cup his cheek, and pulled him into a gentle kiss. It quickly grew hotter and needier though, until it was all tongue and teeth and soft gasps as Dave slid his hand up into Klaus's hair, with Klaus's hands clawing at his back.

Dave was the first one to pull away, immediately turning his attention lower, biting and leaving open-mouthed kisses along Klaus's neck and collarbones. Klaus's hand started traveling lower too, over Dave's waist and hip and finally settling on his bulge, palming it and feeling the vibrations from Dave's groans on his neck.

Planting both hands on Klaus's waist, Dave started to walk backward until the backs of his knees were against the bed. Klaus pressed a hand to Dave's chest, feeling his own cock twitch in his pants at the feeling of the firm muscles, and gently pushed him back into a sitting position.

Kicking off his shoes, Klaus turned and slowly pushed his pants down, making sure to arch his back and grin seductively over his shoulder as he did so. Now just in a pair of skimpy blue briefs, he spun back around and straddled Dave's legs, letting out a soft moan at the feeling of their cocks pressing together through the few thin layers of cloth.

Dave didn't hesitate to pull him into another deep kiss, sliding his hands down to cup Klaus's ass as Klaus's hands explored Dave's chest and abs, both of them growing harder by the second.

Klaus finally broke off the kiss and whispered,  _ "Fuck. _ Hang on a sec." He slid off of Dave's lap, leaning down over his coat and pulling a condom and lube from one of the pockets.

"You just... carry those around with you?" Dave asked with a smirk as Klaus tossed them onto the bed.

"D'you know the first rule of Boy Scouts?"

Dave laughed. "I wouldn't necessarily think to be prepared for this."

Klaus shot him a grin and retorted, "Well it's a good thing I am." Walking toward the tiny bathroom, he said, "Give me a few minutes to get ready, okay? And you'd better have your pants off by the time I get back." He flicked on the light inside and closed the door, and Dave was left with the lasting image of the way Klaus's ass moved as he walked.

It was perfectly pillowy and round, and the underwear did little to cover it up, Dave found himself thinking as he pulled off his shoes and pants, dropping his underwear with them. The little blue briefs must've shown off nearly half of Klaus's big perky ass, and Dave thought about how fun it would be to spank it and watch it jiggle.

After a few achingly long minutes, Klaus emerged from the bathroom, naked and biting his lip as he leaned against the doorway seductively. Smiling, Dave stood to meet him, but Klaus just gestured for him to sit back down and said, "Just lay back, Davey. I'll take care of everything."

Dave wasn't about to say no to that, and he scooted up the bed until he was lying against the pillows, with Klaus climbing over him, knees on either side of Dave's legs, sitting back on his heels and reaching over for the condom.

Pulling it out of the wrapper, Klaus wasted no time in rolling it onto Dave's cock and dripping lube over it, stroking him a few times to get him fully coated.

He shuffled forward on his knees until he was positioned over Dave's cock and slowly let himself sink down, letting out a moan as he fully took Dave in.

Dave's hands shot up to Klaus's waist and held him as he began to ease himself up and back down, growing faster and more desperate each time until he was full-on riding him.

The harder Klaus took it, the louder he moaned, to the point where Dave felt bad for whoever was staying in the room below them. The sight before him was one Dave would never forget, though- Klaus sweating and panting, head thrown back, letting out gorgeous noises of pleasure as he fucked himself on Dave's dick.

Just as the tight heat was about to overwhelm Dave entirely, Klaus stilled, letting out a high-pitched squeak of a moan and slowly but deliberately dropping himself down over and over so Dave's cock was hitting one particular spot inside of him. Dave could only assume that it was his prostate.

Dave slid his hand down from Klaus's waist, grabbing his cock instead and nearly causing him to fall over as Dave began jerking him off.

Letting out one final broken cry, Klaus came hard onto Dave's stomach, weakly forcing his prostate down onto Dave's cock a few more times before sliding off with a wince and a gasping moan.

Scooting backward again, he leaned down and licked all of his own cum off of Dave, shuddering at the feeling of Dave's abs twitching under his tongue.

He pulled the condom off of Dave as he slid back further and dropped his head down, taking all of Dave's cock down his throat at once. It only took a few swallows and bobs of his head before Dave was coming into Klaus's mouth and Klaus was swallowing it all.

Sighing, Klaus threw himself onto the bed next to Dave and rolled onto his side to face him. Dave rolled over too, to meet him, and whispered, "That was fun," with a giggle.

Klaus grinned and replied, "It was." As they awkwardly shuffled around so they were under the blankets, though, Klaus found himself contemplating whether or not he should tell Dave. About  _ everything. _

Once they were settled, Dave on his back and Klaus snuggled into his chest, Klaus looked up at him and mumbled, "Um... can I tell you something?"

"Of course," Dave said. "Anything."

"Okay, um..." Klaus found himself hesitating, but waiting wasn't going to make it any easier. "Have you ever heard of the Umbrella Academy?"

Dave nodded, "Yeah, of course. I was never into them the way my sister was, though. She was  _ obsessed _ with Allison."

Klaus let out something between a sigh and a laugh and continued, "Okay, good. That will make this easier." He took a deep breath. "Basically, I was one of them.  _ Am _ one of them. And I can see ghosts. Which is why the mob is after me, because they know I can see Zeph- the dead guy- and they know that I've been talking to him."

After a moment's hesitation, Dave simply said, "Well I guess that explains why your brother looks nothing like you."

Klaus sighed in relief and set his head back down on Dave's shoulder. "Yeah," he mumbled. "Yeah, it does."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! <3 (Title from Natalie by Hunny.)


	7. Collecting Pictures From the Flood That Wrecked Our Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You have to go."
> 
> "No," Dave said instantly. "I'm staying with you. I'm not going anywhere."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy, as always. <3

Klaus stood in the shallows of a lake, surrounded by darkened woods on all sides. A light shone over the water in front of him, and he found himself reaching his arm out toward it. The mud around his feet was cold, and he sank a bit with each step he took forward. The water slowly rose up higher on his body too.

The light was just feet away, though, when he felt a large hand grab his ankle. It pulled him under, and the water was suddenly much deeper now, extending into a black void beneath him. When Klaus blinked the stinging water out of his eyes, he looked down and saw that the owner of the hand was none other than the larger man from the car, from the street, from the mob.

Klaus tried to scream, but bubbles were the only thing that flowed out of his lungs and into the water above.

_ "Klaus!"  _ a voice called. He looked back up and saw Dave, upper body extending into the water, reaching a hand out for him to hold. "Grab on!"

Klaus didn't bother wondering why Dave could speak and he couldn't- he was too busy stretching his arm up in an effort to grab Dave's hand and be pulled to safety.

But he couldn't. He sank faster than Dave could swim down toward him. He tried to call out Dave's name, but he couldn't form the words. His mouth felt empty save for the ice-cold water and his own teeth.

Klaus's endless plunge was suddenly interrupted by a sharp noise, and he was pulled out of the blackness of his own mind and back into the motel room. Beside him, Dave grumbled and rolled over. The second time the noise came, a few seconds later, Klaus realized it was the ring of a phone.

Sighing, Dave lifted himself from the bed and dropped to the floor to fumble around for his pants. Pulling his phone from the pocket, he mumbled, "Unknown number..." but answered it nonetheless.

"Hello?" he asked blearily.

"You guys need to get the box and get out of there  _ fast." _

"What- Who- What box? Who is this?"

The voice on the other end sounded young. Nervous. "Name's Frenchie," he said. "I'm with the mob- or- I  _ was. _ But I'm leaving."

Dave shot Klaus a puzzled look- one that wasn't returned, since Klaus couldn't hear the man on the other end.

"...How did you get this number?" Dave asked uncertainly.

"Connections," Frenchie replied simply. "I can find out anything with enough digging. Well-  _ almost _ anything. I don't know where the box is. But you do."

Brow furrowed in confusion, Dave said, "What box? What are you talking about?"

"The evid-" The phone was snatched from Dave's hand.

"Hey, it's Klaus now," he said into the phone. Klaus turned away to continue speaking, and Dave found his eyes drifting down Klaus's back and toward-

"Yeah, it's out in Lingway Park," he said. Then after a pause, "Really? Okay, that's awesome. I just hope we can dig it up before they get there." Klaus chuckled. After a moment, he continued, "Yeah, okay. We can manage that. Thank you so much," before hanging up.

He turned back to Dave. "The box of evidence that Zeph had been digging up on the mob is buried in the park, and we're gonna go and-  _ literally _ \- dig it up, and bring it to the cops. Guy called in a tip that we're gonna be there at eleven, so we should have just enough time to get there and get the box before the cops show up."

Dave nodded. It was a lot to take in so quickly, but then again, so was everything about the past couple of days. "So," he said, "We should probably, um... put on some clothes, huh?"

A tinge of pink crept up to Klaus's cheeks as he bit his lip and nodded.

Dave stood, holding his pants but not putting them on yet. "And... a quickie would probably be cutting it kinda close, right?"

Smirking, Klaus stood too and pulled Dave in for a gentle kiss. "We'll have all the time in the world for that as soon as this is all sorted out."

"Yeah," Dave mumbled, "You're right." Pulling on his underwear and pants, he continued, "So you know exactly where this box is?"

"Yes. Well, mostly. Within a few feet or so." Klaus replied, squeezing into his absurd leather pants and pulling his shirt over his head.

"Okay. Do we have anything to dig with?"

As he picked up his coat from the floor, Klaus said, "Well I don't know about you, but I have a couple of perfectly good hands."

-

"Wait wait wait,  _ where _ are you going?"

"To arrest your brother again. Why?"

_ "No!"  _ Diego shouted. "Eudora, you  _ can't."  _ He was trailing behind her as she walked to the unmarked car. He'd already been on his way to the station when he heard the dispatch call over his radio, so it was easy to rush the rest of the drive and catch up with the cops.

Climbing into the passenger seat, Eudora said, "I can and I will and I  _ have to, _ Diego. Now  _ go." _

"Who called in the tip?" Diego asked.

"I'm not at liberty to tell you that."

"Did they say anything about the mob? Maybe they know about it, about what's happening, m-maybe they can  _ help-" _

_ "Diego," _ Eudora said firmly, "You need to  _ stop _ with the mob shit. Just because Klaus thinks he's been seeing the same car around, it doesn't- you can't just-  _ ugh." _ She let out a sound of frustration and said, "Can you just go? Please? You've already been in my way enough lately."

Sighing and stepping back from the car, Diego replied, "Fine. I'm meeting you there, though."

Eudora closed the car door. "No, you're not."

Diego turned back to walk to his own car and called over his shoulder, "See you in a few, Eudora."

-

On the bus and on the walk to the tree Zeph had previously pointed out, Klaus and Dave were constantly looking over their shoulders and eyeing every car that passed- probably drawing more suspicion to themselves, if anything.

"Here," Klaus said as they arrived at the spot. The dirt was already disturbed, like it had been dug up before within the past few weeks.

He kneeled down and slowly pushed his fingers into the dirt. After a few handfuls, Dave realized he should be helping and sat beside Klaus.

They dug and they dug. Klaus felt dirt deeper under his nails than he would've thought possible, and as fast as he tried to go, they were still only inches down after what felt like forever.

They were going to run out of time.

After a while longer, when they were close to a foot down with still no sign of the box, Dave pulled out his phone, surely smudging dirt all over it, and said,  _ "Fuck, _ it's almost eleven already."

"Have to go faster," Klaus mumbled, barely even audible to himself.

After what felt like hours more, but was probably more like minutes, Klaus felt his hands scrape cardboard, and he exclaimed, "Here! I've got it!" He leaned down and rushed to pull up the last few handfuls of dirt before bringing the cardboard file box up too. It was damp and dirty, but when Klaus pulled the cover off, the contents were intact.

"Right on time," Dave said, pointing to the street beyond the park where police cars were beginning to pull up.

Klaus dropped the box and grabbed Dave's hand, pulling them both to their feet and saying, "You have to go."

_ "No,"  _ Dave said instantly. "I'm staying with you. I'm not going anywhere."

Klaus reached for Dave's face, smearing dirt across his cheek as he pulled him in for a desperate kiss. "Please," he said, tears nearly forming in his eyes. "I'll be okay, no matter what happens. I don't want you in this anymore."

Dave solemnly nodded and rested his forehead against Klaus's.

"And hey," Klaus continued, "I'll come find you when this is all over, okay? I don't want this to be the end for us."

Dave kissed him again while a tear wiped away the grime in a single streak down his face. "Okay," he said softly. "I don't either."

Reluctantly, he pulled himself away from Klaus and turned to make a break for the street, running parallel to where the cops were arriving from.

He took one last glance back over his shoulder and-

Doing a double-take, he spun on his heels and yelled out Klaus's name.

Approaching from the opposite end of the park was the larger man that had been stalking them, along with another figure that Dave didn't recognize.

Klaus turned to look and- upon seeing that Dave was looking past him- spun around to face the two men just in time to register their presence before a burlap sack was being shoved over his head and he was knocked unconscious as Dave shouted out,  _ "NO!"  _

Dave ran for the pair of large men, determined to do everything in his power to stop Klaus from being taken and to stop whatever god-awful shit they intended on doing to him. A shudder ran down Dave's spine even thinking about it.

The man he didn't recognize was tying Klaus's hands together behind his back, but the other was facing Dave, postured and ready.

Dave nearly stumbled and fell, though, when he noticed the other sack and length of rope that lay on the ground next to them. They were planning on taking him too.

Eyes wide, Dave came to a halt in front of the man, and barely had time to see the fist flying toward his head before everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, I hate myself for that cliffhanger too. (Title from Youth by Daughter.)


	8. Spitting Out the Blood and Screaming "Someone Save Us"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm not gonna kill him," she said. "Relax, Katz. I just need to make sure he doesn't talk."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter before the epilogue! If you've stuck with me for this long then I can't thank you enough! Warning, this chapter gets a bit gory.

They were fucked.

That was the first thing Klaus thought when a splash of ice cold water dragged him back to consciousness.

Completely and royally fucked.

He tried to lift his arms only to find them tied down to a chair. Two men stood in front of him, one being the unfamiliar one who'd just kidnapped him, and the other being one he vaguely recognized.

Looking to his left, he saw the thin man- the one who'd been following them in the car- tied to another chair, beaten and bloody, head hung down. Klaus turned and saw Dave on his other side, and Dave was looking back at him.

They were in a large warehouse-looking room, with a cheap wood floor and vapor lamps hung from high ceilings. There were two sets of large double-doors across the room from them, and another single door off to the side of the room, closest to the lanky man in the chair beside him.

The room smelled faintly of cigarettes and old musty wood, and the air was cold against Klaus's skin, having had his coat removed at some point before he awoke.

"The boss will be here in just a minute," said the seemingly familiar man, before turning and walking away along with the other.

Leaning over toward Dave, Klaus whispered, "I think I've slept with that guy."

"Nice," Dave replied, not looking at him, with no emotion in his voice. "...What do we do now?"

Klaus just shook his head. "No idea. But... I'm sorry." Dave turned to face him. He continued, "I'm  _ so _ sorry, about all of this. I shouldn't have gotten you involved."

"It's not your fault," Dave said quietly, "You warned me, but I still insisted. If anything, it's my own fault that I'm here."

"No, it's  _ my _ fault." Klaus and Dave both turned to face the new voice, belonging to the young man tied up next to them.

Dave instantly recognized his voice from the phone, asking, "Frenchie, right?"

He nodded. "I'm so sorry, guys. I was new, and trying to prove myself, and I'm the one who tipped them off a few weeks ago that Zeph was getting ready to go to the cops. He  _ trusted  _ me with it. And I betrayed him." His voice cracked, and Klaus could see his lip quivering a bit.

Frenchie took a deep breath before continuing, "And now you're both in this mess too. All because of me being stupid and thinking I was helping."

Klaus and Dave looked back at each other, brows furrowed, not knowing what to say. After a moment's hesitation, Dave spoke up. "So how'd you end up  _ here? _ Now?"

"They caught me," Frenchie mumbled. "They caught me calling you guys and looked through my phone log and saw that I'd called the cops too. I'm sorry." He took another shuddering breath.  _ "I'm so sorry." _

"Hey, it's okay," Klaus said. "It's not about what you  _ did. _ It's about what you're  _ doing, _ and what you're trying to fix."

Frenchie nodded. "Yeah," he said quietly. "Yeah, and I'm-"

"Well, well, well," a voice sounded from in front of them. One set of the large doors opened to reveal a woman in a sharp business suit, her auburn hair pulled back into a ponytail. "Look what the hitmen dragged in."

Along with her were the two men who'd taken Klaus and Dave, one of whom was the former partner of Frenchie. He was carrying the box that had been dug up just-  _ how long had it been? _ \- hours ago?

"Let's get the formalities out of the way first, shall we?" she asked. Gesturing to each of them, she listed off, "Dave, Klaus, Frenchie," Pointing to the man on her right, she said, "Kitty. He was the trigger man on your little ghost friend." Pointing to her left, she said, "And Loren. You know him quite well, though, don't you, Frenchie?" Frenchie just sneered.

"And you can call me Ma," she said, before pausing. "Actually, you can't. That's what I call myself. None of you are to call me anything. Understand?"

No one moved an inch. Sighing, she said, "I'm going to assume you all understand, for your sakes."

As Loren set the box down in front of the three restrained figures, Ma continued, "Now, more importantly, the main event. Each of you has a decision to make. You can keep one..." She leaned down and tapped her nails against the dirty cardboard lid. "The box..."

Standing back up, she gestured to Kitty, who pulled a gun out from somewhere under his suit jacket. "Or your life."

Frenchie immediately spoke. "The box," he said. "The box is more important than anyth-"

A tremendous  _ BANG _ forced its way through Klaus and Dave's ears and off of the walls of the confined room and back into their ears again, as Frenchie's head lolled to the side, brains now splattered across the floor behind him.

"Any other takers?" Ma asked.

Wide-eyed, Klaus and Dave looked at each other again. "Our lives," Klaus whispered to him.

"Why? The box could help so many more people if they-"

Ma interjected, "Tick tock, boys."

"Listen," Klaus whispered, more urgently. "If they kill us both they're just gonna destroy the box anyway.  _ Our lives,  _ Dave."

Dave nodded. "You're right." He turned back to the three figures looming over them. "Our lives," he said firmly.

"Hm. Smart," Ma said. Stepping back, she continued, "Now, Kitty's gonna stay here and watch you boys. Loren and I will be right back."

"Nonbinary," Klaus muttered as the two walked away. "Not  _ boys." _

_ "People,"  _ Ma called over her shoulder, "We'll be right back."

There was silence for a moment after the large doors closed. Kitty just stared at the back wall, arms crossed, unmoving.

Dave mumbled something too quietly for Klaus to hear. "Hmm?" he asked.

"I said I love you," Dave said, barely any louder. "And I just want you to know that. No matter what happens, I love you."

Klaus's lip quivered, and he had to blink the tears away since he couldn't wipe them with his hands bound. He whispered, "Oh, Dave, I can never repay you for everything you've done for me in the past few days. And I lo-"

They both turned to face the sound of the doors swinging open again. "Okay," Ma said as soon as she was within earshot, "Now for our  _ next _ issue."

"I realize there's not much use in killing Frenchie, since the  _ reason _ you guys are here in the first place is that  _ that one-" _ She pointed to Klaus. "-can see ghosts. So we're gonna have to do something about that too. But first..."

She pulled a matchbook out of her pocket as she approached the box in the center of the floor. Klaus and Dave could only watch as she struck one and dropped it onto the top of the box, quickly igniting the cardboard and anything contained within. She looked up at them and said, "You chose your lives, after all."

"Now..." she said, standing over the burning bits of whatever hope Klaus and Dave had left. "We need to keep  _ you _ quiet. Make sure you never say a word about this to anyone."

Dave, pushing against the restraints, shouted through his tears, "Don't you  _ dare _ kill him. I swear, I'll-"

"I'm not gonna kill him," Ma said. "Relax, Katz. I just need to make sure he doesn't talk."

Dave looked at Klaus, eyebrows raised, but Klaus was busy looking elsewhere. It was just then that he'd noticed the pair of thick, industrial-looking scissors in Loren's hand.

Ma turned to Loren.

"Cut out his tongue."

Eyes widening, Klaus frantically began shouting, "No no no  _ no no NO NO,"  _ as Loren stepped forward with the scissors.

"Stop!" Dave yelled, "We'll keep quiet, just don't hurt him!" They were both straining against the ropes that kept them tethered down, and Klaus clenched his jaw, letting out little muffled noises of protest as the two large men approached.

And then a large rough hand was on his chin, forcing his mouth open as he cried out, looking for salvation that wouldn't come.

Dave thrashed and writhed in his chair, trying anything and everything to break himself free, but the ropes were just too tight, too strong.

He wished he could be in Klaus's position, but at the same time, he wasn't sure, because the pain and distress of watching and not being able to do anything just might rival what Klaus himself was feeling.

Finally prying his jaw down, Kitty grabbed Klaus's tongue with large fingers tasting of sweat and stale cigarettes. Klaus felt himself gag, but he didn't know if it was from the taste and smell or from the fear building in his gut.

Once his tongue was stretched out of his mouth, he looked and saw Loren approaching with the large scissors- almost more like pruning shears. They looked like they were intended for either gardening or medieval torture.

Once they were opened and moving toward his mouth, Klaus shut his eyes tightly, feeling a few tears trickle out as he did. Dave was screaming out,  _ "NO!" _ and still thrashing against his restraints, and Klaus was shaking and wincing at the feeling of cold metal being slid around his tongue as he awaited the inevitable.

"Evelyn, honey? What are you doing?"

Everyone stilled in an instant and all five heads turned to find the source of the unfamiliar voice.

It was a woman in an orange tank top and pink pajama shorts, standing on the threshold of the open side door, her light brown face illuminated by the overhead lights. A look of concern was painted on her soft features as she took a step forward.

Ma's eyes widened. "What are you doing here? I told you to wait in the car," she said in a hushed tone as she walked over to the other woman.

"I just wanted to see what you were up to," came the reply.

She scanned the room and her face dropped upon seeing Frenchie dead in his chair.  _ "No!"  _ she cried out.  _ "You promised me you wouldn't hurt him!" _

"I promise a lot of people a lot of things, babe," Ma said, "But sometimes business gets in the way.  _ Now would you please get back in the ca-" _

"You have to make it up to me."

"What? Ginny, no-"

"You  _ have to,"  _ the one called Ginny said. "You broke your promise."

The scissors were removed from Klaus's tongue as Loren and Kitty made eye contact and Klaus and Dave did the same.

Ma said, "Well I can figure out a way to make it up to you  _ later  _ but right now I'm  _ busy," _ as she pressed her hands to Ginny's shoulders, trying to guide her back out through the door.

"No!" As she pushed Ma's arms away, Klaus noticed their matching silver rings, each etched with some design that he couldn't make out.

Ma sighed in exasperation and said, "Okay. What do you want me to do?"

Ginny pointed at Klaus and Dave. "I want you to let them go."

_ "What?  _ No. Absolutely not. Out of the question." When she was met with only a pout and a pair of puppy eyes, she continued, "Do you have any idea how dangerous it would be to just let them go and do nothing?"

Ginny's pout only deepened, and she asked, "Please?"

Sighing again, Ma said, "Fine." She turned back to Klaus and Dave. "But if I  _ ever _ get word of either of you letting out a  _ single peep _ about this, you're both  _ dead. _ Got it?"

They both nodded quickly, and Ma said, "Good. Smart boys- sorry-  _ people." _

Dave cleared his throat and chimed in, "Oh, and uhh... Do you think getting Klaus off the hook for the murder could also be part of this deal?"

Klaus frantically whispered,  _ "What are you doing?!" _ but Dave just shrugged.

"Oh," Ma said, "So you think  _ you're _ in a position to be making demands? That's cute. Now I suggest you take what you can get and run off just appreciating the fact that you're even  _ alive-" _

"Please, Evelyn?" Ginny asked, that same pout back on her face.

_ "Baby, I told you not to call me that around other people. We've been over this,"  _ Ma whispered. "But... Fine. Okay. They can take Kitty's gun, and that will get them-"

"Oh thank you, thank you,  _ thank you, _ sweetheart!" Ginny exclaimed, jumping up and down in place. "I love you so much."

Despite the dim lighting, Klaus could swear he saw a hint of pink crawling onto the boss's cheeks. "Aww, babe, I love you too," she mumbled. "Now would you  _ please _ get back in the car before-"

Her head snapped up, as did everyone else's, at the sound of sirens approaching in the distance.

She grabbed Ginny's hand and ran for the side door. "Kitty, leave your gun, and let's  _ go!" _

Klaus and Dave could do nothing but watch as the man dropped the gun onto the smoldering remains of the box and followed Loren and their boss to the door.

Their ears were met with the muffled sound of Ginny asking, "Aren't you gonna untie them?" as she was shepherded out the door by Ma, who replied that there was no time.

Once the room was silent, save for the rapidly approaching sirens, Klaus turned to Dave and said, "So... I never got to finish my sentence earlier."

After a moment's hesitation, Dave let out an awkward laugh. "I honestly don't remember what we were talking about before all of that."

"Well," Klaus mumbled, "You told me you loved me. And... I was about to say that I love you too."

Just then the large front doors flew open and nearly a dozen cops burst in, weapons at the ready.  _ "Klaus! Other guy!"  _ a familiar voice shouted.

Klaus grinned brightly at the face of his brother amongst the officers. "Diego!" he called. "Believe me now?"

"Of course I do, dumbass," Diego said as he rushed forward and dropped to his knees next to his sibling's chair to begin untying the ropes.

The female detective from what felt like ages ago was leaning down next to Dave to do the same. "Who would've thought, huh?" she asked, sending Diego a smirk and an eye-roll.

Klaus could vaguely hear Dave explaining everything that happened- from the kidnapping to the tongue to the gun that lay on the box before them- but Klaus was distracted by a soft voice from behind him saying, "They're gone... I just died for nothing."

Klaus recognized his other brother's voice giving the response of, "You didn't. You died to save Klaus, and that's something I can never repay you for." Klaus craned his neck around and saw the pair hugging out of the corner of his eye.

And just like that, he was free from his restraints, and he immediately stood, rubbing his sore wrists and looking at Dave.

"Do you have any idea where they went?" the detective asked in her firm voice.

Klaus and Dave locked eyes for a moment before turning back to her. They shook their heads and said in unison, "No."

Even if they'd known, their answer would've been the same, or else next time it might be something much worse than a tongue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Just a short epilogue next week. I hope you've all enjoyed this journey so far. Ily all <3 (Title from Heaven Help Us by My Chemical Romance)


	9. In the Years That Passed Since I Saw You Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a few warm, blissful moments, Dave turned to look at the clock. He had to open the shop soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final part! My dear friend dyll-pickless requested that I write a spinoff oneshot of Ben and Frenchie's ghost friendship, so maybe keep an eye out for that in the future. I hope you guys have enjoyed this journey with me, and I hope you enjoy this last little bit!

Dave woke up to the morning sun streaming in through his bedroom window. Turning his head, he saw Klaus- sweet, beautiful Klaus- curled up against his chest, humming contentedly in his sleep.

When Dave gently brushed a lock of hair out of Klaus's face, he began to stir, and mumbled something about, "Mmm, warm. Comfy. Love you."

"Love you too," Dave said softly. "Happy two months, sweetheart."

Klaus grinned and snuggled deeper into Dave's side with a playful little growl. "Oh yeah. Almost forgot."

Dave gently pushed Klaus away and rolled over so he was on top of him. Kissing down his cheek, onto his neck, Dave mumbled, "Love you so much. Wanna celebrate the occasion?"

Humming in the back of his throat, Klaus replied, "Yes, absolutely."

He would never get over Dave's warmth- not only of his personality, but of his body as he was positioned over and inside of Klaus. It was like a big cozy bear hug that he never wanted to leave. He felt safe and protected and  _ free, _ something he hadn't felt in so many years.

When they were finished, Dave rolled off of Klaus, who resumed his position at Dave's side, hand on his chest and nose in his neck.

"Do you really  _ have _ to get up for work?" Klaus whined.

"You know I do, honey," Dave replied, "But we can still cuddle for a little while longer before then."

Klaus pouted and mumbled, "Okay," against Dave's shoulder.

"You're so perfect," Dave whispered, craning his neck to press a gentle kiss to the top of Klaus's head. Klaus- so full of love and wit and just the right amount of insanity- was everything Dave ever could've wanted and more.

After a few warm, blissful moments, Dave turned to look at the clock. He had to open the shop soon. Gently pulling himself from under Klaus, he said, "I have to get ready, angel. Do you want to shower together?"

Klaus grumbled a little before saying, "Need more sleep. You go," and dismissing Dave with a flourish of his hand.

Dave chuckled, turning around as he stood, and leaning in for one last kiss. "Okay, sleepyhead. I love you."

Klaus smiled, eyes closed and nose nuzzling back into the pillow. "Mm, love you too."

After quickly showering and throwing on his clothes and apron, Dave climbed down the stairs into the bakery, on the floor below his apartment. Once the day's pastries were set out and the register was open, he walked up to the front door to unlock it.

Dave clicked the latch, and as he turned the 'OPEN' sign around, he caught a glimpse of the world outside.

Parked across the street was an old black Chevrolet. Dave squinted at it, but before he could make out any further details, it sped off into the city.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with me for this long! As always, feedback is appreciated. I love you all and I'll see you next time. <3


End file.
